Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Randomize
