Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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