Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize