so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Randomize