never play flip cup with pint glasses
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
