he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
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