I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Randomize