She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
We are all done wearing pants today
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Randomize
