end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
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