I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
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