hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
