Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
