Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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