I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize