exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Randomize
