I hate all girls vehemently.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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