it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
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