why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
