Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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