So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
so much tequila, so little girl.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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