OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Rumble strips road head = magical
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
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