i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize
