yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize