So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
My hand turned me down
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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