So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
