just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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