suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
