Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
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