i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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