he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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