You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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