The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Randomize
