I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
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