Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
