They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
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