I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize
