How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Randomize
