Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
worst night to have a conscience
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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