if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
These People Had Regrettable One Night Stands
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
This Girl Makes Latte Art That’s Too Cute to Drink
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand