Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Randomize
