I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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