Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
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