That's intense
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
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he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
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I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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