You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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