kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize