how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize
