Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie. http://tfl.nu/rlm3
  Replies (20) Good night (2541) Bad night (714)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Why does Jon Cryer have a career?

  (1-860): View more from Connecticut

  That is a good question.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): Why does Jon Cryer have a career? (1-860): That is a good question. http://tfl.nu/v28q
  Replies (14) Good night (1338) Bad night (756)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture http://tfl.nu/ttvt
  Replies (46) Good night (671) Bad night (2960)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise. http://tfl.nu/s84e
  Replies (7) Good night (6762) Bad night (684)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again? http://tfl.nu/cny9
  Replies (13) Good night (923) Bad night (5629)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (336): I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality http://tfl.nu/g1bs
  Replies (73) Good night (1511) Bad night (12938)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (313): How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going? http://tfl.nu/4fop
  Replies (11) Good night (1262) Bad night (4201)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (503): There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize. http://tfl.nu/694m
  Replies (8) Good night (4454) Bad night (1077)
• Favorite

  (989): View more from Michigan

  It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (989): It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat. http://tfl.nu/ln17
  Replies (28) Good night (6036) Bad night (1414)
• Favorite

  (229): View more from Georgia

  He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (229): He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb. http://tfl.nu/1qwr
  Replies (5) Good night (2102) Bad night (729)
• Favorite

  (808): View more from Hawaii

  My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (808): My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE. http://tfl.nu/6uku
  Replies (4) Good night (1352) Bad night (601)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel. http://tfl.nu/9ny9
  Replies (9) Good night (1770) Bad night (533)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (920): Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night? http://tfl.nu/ykmq
  Replies (4) Good night (678) Bad night (749)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (845): I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN http://tfl.nu/jodt
  Replies (8) Good night (835) Bad night (474)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots http://tfl.nu/1mi3
  Replies (6) Good night (1624) Bad night (540)

Randomize