Texts From Last Night

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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket

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  (215): I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket http://tfl.nu/8xo3
  Replies (11) Good night (3804) Bad night (677)
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  (353): View more from

  I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number

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  (353): I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number http://tfl.nu/ogfc
  Replies (7) Good night (682) Bad night (4143)
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.

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  (231): Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life. http://tfl.nu/gt3a
  Replies (25) Good night (4019) Bad night (824)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.

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  (480): Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas. http://tfl.nu/ugcx
  Replies (9) Good night (3823) Bad night (935)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.

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  (443): My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat. http://tfl.nu/c3g0
  Replies (46) Good night (4562) Bad night (656)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..

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  (843): He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex.. http://tfl.nu/g01t
  Replies (17) Good night (5094) Bad night (664)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.

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  (850): I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night. http://tfl.nu/vbgm
  Replies (10) Good night (4765) Bad night (1341)
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.

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  (217): he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school. http://tfl.nu/g6u7
  Replies (10) Good night (1982) Bad night (4008)
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  (239): View more from Florida

  In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.

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  (239): In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now. http://tfl.nu/wa2b
  Replies (32) Good night (9369) Bad night (1753)
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.

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  (701): Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend. (701): The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer. http://tfl.nu/9cgs
  Replies (7) Good night (2109) Bad night (922)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.

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  (604): I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina. http://tfl.nu/byss
  Replies (3) Good night (1181) Bad night (464)
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  (619): View more from California

  Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done

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  (619): Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done http://tfl.nu/oq1m
  Replies (2) Good night (855) Bad night (381)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.

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  (208): Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow. http://tfl.nu/1euv
  Replies (1) Good night (781) Bad night (333)
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.

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  (250): During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high. http://tfl.nu/970w
  Replies (6) Good night (829) Bad night (355)
• Favorite

  (865): View more from Tennessee

  Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.

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  (865): Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville. http://tfl.nu/d4yv
  Replies (3) Good night (678) Bad night (286)

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