I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
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literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
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Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money