i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
