My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize