We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
he was CRYING into my vagina
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
